With over fifty percent of all marriages ending in divorce, and many people staying with their partners despite abuse, or addiction, or having grown apart, it’s clear holding onto what looks proper from the outside is not enough.
I know of many people who have tried to make changes in their relationships but have lacked the information to be successful. Any time we are engaging in criticism or blame or negative self talk, we have moved away from honour.
So much so, I am often asked, why would a Narcissist leave you, only to later return back to the relationship?
What would possess a Narcissist to hurt you so deeply, only to come back on bended knee, and beg for forgiveness?
This process continues on, even during the break up stages! Once you validate him by responding to him in any way, shape or form, he’s got his fix and he will move on to the next best high.
Precisely for this reason, victims MUST remember that while we may feel intoxicated by his change of heart, the minute you take him back, and the minute he realizes that he HAS you again, he will immediately revert back to his old cruel behavior.
While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with this, I know of many people who reach their 60s and are aware that their relationships are not all they would like them to be.
They would like to explore different kinds of relationships, or improve the ones they are in, yet feel confined to fulfilling traditional roles and acting in ways that are deemed “appropriate”.
You must accept that it’s a mental mind game, and the ONLY reason a Narcissist continues to come back is to ensure that he still has you right where he wants you! In addition, in the event a Narcissist is experiencing ‘withdrawal’ from not having enough ‘Narcissistic Supply’, he will immediately swing back into pursuit mode, with the goal of winning you over.
After all, a Narcissist does not want to be alone, and he constantly needs someone to validate him.
Probably one of the most confusing and difficult things we all face when being involved with a Narcissist, is the crazing making ‘painful’ cycles of breaking up, followed by the HIGH’s of making up.
Unfortunately, it is an inevitable process that comes along with being involved in a Narcissistic Relationship!
And, even if your partner isn’t on board with all of these, your choice to include them and be them will create huge changes in whatever relationship(s) you are in.